Even though I shouldn't be, I am surprised and dismayed at people who can't accept that everyone is different.
I've always enjoyed the diversity of people. We are all so different, and I find it interesting to hear about someone elses upbringing and life, and to hear their stories and sometimes to share in the things they like to do that I would've never thought to do.
There are things that I love and feel very passionate about that someone else will say "Meh!" There are some things that I would never do that others love to do. It's what makes life interesting.
Maybe it was where I was raised. Most people, when they hear that I'm from Utah always, without fail, ask if I'm Mormon. But the area I grew up in was different that the Salt Lake or Provo valley. I grew up in central Utah in the coal mining area. A lot of different people went there to work in the mines. There were as many Catholics in my town as Mormons. There were also a few Greek Orthodox families that gave our town some nice variety. We also had one African American family and they were the most popular kids in each class.
One would think that our gay community would be the leaders in this, right? We want to be accepted by others, so we are more accepting of different people. Well.... most of us.
This weekend I was caught off guard by someone who belittled me for not liking the same things he did. He asked how long I spent on "that damn blog" and belittled me about some other things that I enjoy doing.
I just don't get his comments. What prompted it was I apologized for not being able to go hang out with him at the pool because the plumbing project took longer than expected (I did get the toilet fixed, all my myself... and it works!!) Then I had all my other chores I had to get to.
This is someone who I called a friend but has made me reconsider who I categorize as such. I think "acquaintance" would be more appropriate for him. Or am I just being too sensitive about it?
Your thoughts and comments are welcome.
8 comments:
It amazes me how insensitive so-called friends can be and how judgmental people are about things that don't matter to them. In the end, all we can do is realize our lives and interests need no validation from others if they make us happy and, sometimes, people we consider friends, close or otherwise, turn out no to be so much as we thought they were. It's sad, but it's life. Do your own thing and surround yourself with people who can and do accept and respect you for who you are.
"Friends" don't belittle you.
I agree with the fellas above. A real friend wouldn't belittle you or make negative comments about things that they knew were important to you. Tell your 'accquaintence' to piss off.
Glad to hear your plumbing is in fine, working order once again.
:-)
Here's a couple truisms for you:
If you want a perfect friend, clone yourself.
If you only accept friends that perfectly suit you, be prepared to live a lonely life.
Jim, do you really have so many friends that you can just toss them aside the minute they say something you don't like or they treat you poorly on some occasion? I know I sure don't.
Rather than downgrading him or cutting him off, did you consider telling him that you are hurt and offended and getting him to understand why? Isn't a friendship worth putting a little effort into?
How rude... I might forgive once... but negative people tend to rub off on others, best to just keep at arms length.
It sounds like a case of Center of Attention Deficit Disorder. Not a good prognosis that.
I'm sure it has more to do with what's happening in his life than yours. And I'm sure you'll give him another chance when it's right for you. If he's a friend, or wants a friend, he'll be there when you're ready.
ALL comments here were valid. I DO BELIEVE some "friendships" come in and later out of our lives as all of us change/grow and move forward. NOT ALL "friendships" carry a lifetime warranty. I've learned to accept that, and still treasure some of those friendships I had years ago as a younger guy, but no longer am in touch with.
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