I had been a Ballroom Dancer at BYU a few years earlier and I quickly caught on that the two-step is basically the same dance steps as the foxtrot.
I watched the dancing for a while and then realized I wanted to learn how to follow. Which I soon learned was about giving up control.
After many months of stumbles and stepping on toes I finally learned how to let go and let someone else be in control. This was more difficult than I thought! I could appreciate Ginger Rogers more now... she did all those great dance steps, in heels and she did them backwards too!
When I finally felt like I could follow I turned the tables and let my friends know I could lead. I am now bi-directional.
There are some other things in life where we have to gives up control. Knowing the things we can control and the things that we have no power over is a difficult lesson to learn.
I can't control the weather. I can't control traffic. Or other people, their moods and attitudes. I need to give up feeling like I have to control these things.
I can control my diet. I can control my activity level. I can control my mood and attitude and how I respond to people.
Sometimes we have to give up the control and trust too! Just like on the dance floor, it's good when I can close my eyes and just follow someone else's lead; totally trust them with the direction we will go. Why do I fight it in life then? Why can't I just sway to the music and let go with the rhythm of life?
11 comments:
I love this post...
Sometimes you have to hear this. It's not easy letting go and losing control of a situation...
Dear Jim:
Please come visit me. You can close your eyes and just follow my lead; totally trust me with the direction we will go. Just go with the rhythm.
Your pal,
Sean
*wink*
This reminds me when my partner and I took two-step lessons. To get the class to mingle they didn't let couples practice together. Since JB is shorter we decided I'd lead. When we finally danced together, JB was totally back-leading. There was just no way to teach him to follow. I gave up let him lead. :)
There is wonderful truth in this. When you're dancing with a partner, you have to trust; you both have to work together to make it a dance - something larger than each of you individually. You must know how to lead as well as how to give your partner a good signal and the time and space necessary to do what they need to do. Sometimes you need dynamic tension in the arms, sometimes you need to act as a counterweight, and sometimes you need to set things up, stand by and just let your partner shine and dazzle.
Yes, exactly.
m.
"Bi-directional!" You're funny! I'd love to dance, but I've never done it!
Learning not to worry about things you can't control is a hugely important life lesson. Very few people I know achieve this.
I know the point of the post was about letting go of the things that are out of one's control, but I really wish I knew how to two-step.
Control is inherent in human nature - it's hard to give up something where we can derieve power! Also as part of a society - we no longer trust and this is sometimes for good reason!
Thank you Will! Well said!
You are right.... the lead and the follower give and take. They need to work together. When they do, the dance feels smooth and effortless.
I miss two stepping - I was a leader and never could 'turn around' - except when swing dancing.
Whatever, I miss dancing ; jolly good fun !
Wow, Will. My partner and I could have benefited from your wisdom when taking our dance lessons. And our marriage counseling! :-)
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